I am a weak, weak little girl. I just woke up from a horrible panic attack. Fast asleep and suddenly woken by an intense pain. Sweating and practically panting like crazy. It’s so silly to have panic attacks, but they are the worst!!! I don’t know what triggered this attack, I SHOULD KNOW! I think in the back of my head I do, I just want to admit it. It’s funny to think Woody Allen and I have the same phobia. HOW THE HELL DOES HE DEAL WITH IT??? I feel like I am practically turning into Woody Allen and the next step is to date my adopted asian daughter. We both are very, very agoraphobic, which means we are afraid of EVERYTHING!!! Every day I push myself more and more to break down walls. My friends  are very supported and help, but I’m still shy about it to them. I put on my brave face but underneath is a terrified little girl. Agoraphobia isn’t going to stop me from what I want in this world. So no matter how many panic attacks I go through, it’s just going to make me stronger in the end!!!! What made the panic stop you ask? My dad. My best friend. I refused to call him at first. I hate being weak and going to my parents for things. After 20 minutes of struggling and nearly fainting, it was time to call the parents and get help. I didn’t want to take a xanax, I don’t like relying on pills. But I took one anyway. I guess I am a bit of a prescribed pill junkie. Thank jebus I live two blocks down from my parents. I had to wait until the panic attack stopped so I could drive up. That’s the worst when you have to force yourself to calm the fuck down. I sat on my bed counting my breathe like I was lamaze class. I went up to their house and my dad knew exactly what I needed. He put on in the living room a Hitchcock movie and sat with me during the movie. We watched The Lady Vanishes from 1938. It was simply wonderful and made me feel a million times better. I love good old classic movies!!!  If you haven’t seen this movie, which I’m sure you haven’t. You should try it. Everyone should watch a black and white movie once in a while. NOT THE FUCKING ARTIST!!! That movie was bullshit.